in Mary Margaret

Trick or Treat?

My friend, Mary Margaret sent a late night, vodka infused email. Her un-edited post Halloween suggestions follow:


Common sense  fled when the retailers combined Halloween, Christmas and Thanksgiving store displays. They managed to lower the bar for bad taste.

To prove my point, some halfwitted parents dressed their baby like the pope and paraded him trick or treating on the white house lawn, riding a mini Popemobile. (Wonder if baby mama’s name is Rose Mary). That’s scary.

I’m not religious, observant, I am cautious. Why take the risk of pissing off offending a well-connected religious figure? If I were the parents of the kid, I’d be keeping an eye out for a giant asteroid using me for target practice. I wonder if they know you can purchase amulets on Amazon prime.

If they wanted to dress the kid as a public figure, the Republicans are masters at scare tactics. They’ve got that Hippocratic oath thing going on too (Delete that; it’s doctors). I confuse the two because the Republicans are obsessed with our health.

If the parents wanted a religious icon, Mike Huckabee is a preacher. He isn’t a sharp dresser and doesn’t drive a special car, but  has that folksy-jovial Pope-alike thing going on. (Have you noticed that Mike bears an amazing resemblance to Spanky in the  Little Rascal series?)

The kid could have trick or treated as Pinocchio/Ted Cruz (They look alike and I get them confused.) He could have toilet papered the white-house lawn then lied about it if he got caught.

The parents have a knack for customizing service vehicles. Why didn’t they dress the kid like a food truck and pass him off as Chris Christi?

Thanksgiving is right around the corner. I’m waiting for the Donald Trump look- alike turkey centerpieces to hit Walmart.

Your friend, Mary Margaret